The best sex toys for the disabled

Stefan Balogh is a licensed occupational therapist with a focus on sexual health. His main job is at BOSSE, a knowledge center that provides advice and support to people with physical disabilities.

People with different functional impairments come to him from all over Sweden to get help finding ways to gain sexual enjoyment. People who have had a stroke, have brain damage or reduced senses and muscle strength, for example,. The vast majority can find ways to have and enjoy sex despite having a disability.

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Functional impairment is no obstacle to enjoying yourself

The vast majority can find ways to have and enjoy sex despite having a disability. But sometimes you have to be really creative.

“I once met a girl who couldn’t use her hands but wanted to be able to masturbate. I realized that you could attach a finger vibrator to the end of a handle that is actually used to wash yourself with. She had the handle in her mouth and controlled the vibrator that way.

Use your body and your disability as the starting point

To be able to have good sex, you need to start with your own body and how it works. For example, the bed can be a bad place to have sex for someone with a disability.

“Have sex where you can use your body at its best. It might be sitting in a wheelchair, standing against a wall or sitting in a sofa or armchair. Using pillows in different shapes can also be agreat help, for example, if you have difficulty staying in the same position. Then the pillows can work well as support. Talk to your occupational therapist and you can get help finding pillows that can help,” says Stefan Balogh.

Broaden your views on sex

Expanding your views on what sex actually is can also lead to finding new ways of enjoyment, regardless of whether you have a disability or not.

“You may think that you can’t have sex, but what you really can’t do is have intercourse. There are so many ideas about what is and isn’t sex. But everyone can benefit from broadening that image. For more tips and information on how a disabled person can have good sex, visit www.sexirorelse.se.

Below, you will find tips for which sex toys work best for people with different functional impairments, both for those with a penis or vagina and clitoris.

For those of you who have a vulva and vagina, there are several different toys to choose from, regardless of whether it is clitoral stimulation or penetration you are looking for. Here you’ll get tips on everything from air pressure vibrators to dildos. Start out with your own body and how it works to find out what the best sex toy for you is.

For those with disabilities with their hands

If you like vibrations but have reduced mobility in your wrists, a u-shaped vibrator where one part is inserted into the vagina and one part stimulates the clitoris is perfect. Those that can be controlled via an app or remote control are a good choice. Once in place, you don’t need to use your hands. Many of these vibrators also work perfectly well together with a partner. Air pressure vibrators are also a good option. They are incredibly effective in giving you clitoral orgasms. An air pressure vibrator also works well for those who have difficulty moving their hands and holding things. You place it over the clitoris and keep it there. If you have difficulty gripping it, you can attach it to your hand with a Velcro strap, for example.

Vibrators for those with reduced feeling and functionality in their hands

If you have reduced senses and need extra strong stimulation, a wand is a perfect tool. The vibrations from wands are more powerful than other vibrators and are therefore very effective even if you have reduced senses. It can also be good to use a wand if you can’t use your fingers, as you can use your chin or knuckles to operate the buttons. You can also lie on your wand if you have difficulty using your hands at all.

Toys for those who can’t use their hands at all

If you cannot use your hands at all, one alternative may be to attach a finger vibrator to some type of extension. For example, you could attach it to a rod or stick and control it by biting on the extension.

For those who like penetration but have problems gripping things

For those who like penetration but find it difficult to grip onto things, there are G-spot dildos that have a built-in vibrator and are specially designed to stimulate the G-spot. Some have a loop in the base that allows you to take it in and out, by inserting a finger into the loop for example.

Another option is dilators. Dilators are actually meant to be used to keep the vagina open after radiation or gender-affirming surgery, for example, but they work just as well as pleasure providers. The dilators come in multiple sets so you can try and find the size that feels most comfortable for you. The fact that they have a loop at the end makes them easy to grab and take in and out. For those who like vibrations, there is also a variant with a removable vibrator.

Another option for those who have difficulty gripping is a dildo with a suction plug. You can attach it to any surface so you can enjoy penetration without having to use your hands.

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For those with a penis, there is everything from loose vaginas to anal dildos and prostate stimulators to choose from. There are also vibrating penis rings that you can use for your own pleasure or together with a partner. Many penis rings can be controlled with a mobile phone app and can offer a good opportunity for a wonderful experience. Start with how your own body works and what you enjoy most to find the best sex toy for you.

For people with reduced mobility in their hands

For people with a penis, it is common to masturbate by moving the foreskin back and forth. If you can’t do it that way or just want a product that makes masturbation extra special, a vibrating artificial vagina that can be attached to a flat surface is perfect. Some bump, rotate and have an easy-to-attach suction plug, so you can pleasure yourself without using your hands.

If you have some function in your hands, there is a wide range of artificial vaginas to choose from. For example, you can hold it between your wrists and enjoy a sensation similar to that of being sucked. And don’t let notions of who should use what toy limit the enjoyment. A clitoral vibrator can work at least as well for a penis.

If you like anal stimulation but have difficulty using your hands, an anal dildo with a suction plug is a good alternative. You can attach it to any flat surface and then enjoy penetration without having to hold your dildo.